Can you love yourself? Show me everything, every reason to be believe in yourself.
- Sufjan Stevens
A sweet Sufjan lullaby always gets me right in the feels. And today it’s the love feels.
When I was a young therapist, I didn’t talk much about love. Something about it seemed out of place when my clients struggled with feeling un-loved, un-loving and the worst, un-lovable. Even in my work with couples, a lot of “love talk” just felt off. Too far from the pain.
I’ve evolved since then, and so has my work. Today, I’m all about love talk. Hell, I call myself a coach for lovers! I’ve come to see my work as really all about love. Whether I’m coaching or counseling, working with an individual, a team or a business leader, the work comes down to love in some way.
The love you want. The love you need. Love for yourself. Love for your others. Love for life. Romantic love, best friend love, coworker love, and customer love. It’s all love.
And when I call my clients lovers, I’m saying you make love and loving a top priority. You want more love in your life, you want to love better – BIGGER maybe – and you want to feel love in all areas of life.
Does this sound like you? Would you like more love? What would feeling more love be like for you? How will your life change when you have more?
What needs to change so you can feel more love in your life?
I’ll go out on a limb here and say it’s loving yourself. Yes, you. I’ll bet the first step to more love in your life is to love. your. self.
I know, I know, it sounds a tad trite. Or precious. But it isn’t really. You and I both know love ain’t easy. It’s complicated, messy & vulnerable. Love is definitely a battlefield. And can be downright painful.
Love also isn’t happiness. Or even joy. No, love is more complex than that. If you’ve ever grieved deeply, you know what I mean. Love showed up then, and you certainly weren’t happy.
Love is tough. Love has grit. And loving yourself takes grit. And resilience. And tenderness, kindness, and compassion for yourself. Self-love is at the heart of everything you desire. Promise.
I invite you to love yourself more. Love more of yourself. And if you’re cringing and eye-rolling and sighing as you read this, then loving yourself, showing yourself, and sharing yourself needs to be #1 for you.
Sure, it’ll take some work. But you’re hard wired for love, you’re here to love. Might as well roll up your sleeves and get to loving. You first. Them next.
You’re ready. It’s time. Time to love yourself. You can do it. And I’m here to help.
Breathe in, breathe out. Ok, let’s do this.
Love,
Buck
